I'm not fruity!
by Becs
Summary: Todd brings up Toby and Lance tells them Pietro's guarded secret. It ain't what you think. Well if you've read the other ones with Toby in it it probably is.


Disclaimer: Own Toby but nothin' else.

"I miss Toby."

It was so unexpected that the rest of the Brotherhood simply stared at Todd in amazement.

"I'm sorry?" Pietro asked.

"I miss him," Todd repeated, "he was really nice even if he did hang out with Jean sometimes. I think maybe he liked her, but then all guys seem to." Lance snickered, which was met by a not so subtle kick from Pietro. Todd raised an eyebrow at them and continued, "I mean, he had the choice to go to the X-Men, be popular, _heaps_ of girls like him, but he chose to stick with us."

"I wonder why?" Lance sniggered, scoring a slap from Pietro.

"I think he was nice too," Freddy nodded, "he really listened and he could make a really good stir-fry."

"What is this? Sharing time?" Pietro asked.

"Well, I miss the way he always used to check out Pietro's butt when he thought no one was watching," Lance grinned.

"He what!?!" Pietro gaped.

"It was really funny!" Lance laughed, " 'specially cause you were so oblivious!"

"Huh?" Todd frowned, "you mean Toby's gay?"

"Gay as they get!" Lance laughed, "and he's really into Pietro!"

Todd looked at Pietro with new interest, "really?"

"Uh-huh," Lance said, "member Duncan's party? Ages ago, before Toby left."

"Lance," Pietro warned.

"Well, he and Pietro hooked up!" Lance burst out laughing.

"It wasn't willing on my part!" Pietro objected, "he was wasted! And he just kissed me!"

"Tongue and everything!" Lance informed Todd and Freddy.

"Shut up Lance!"

"And you know what he said to Pietro?" Lance continued, ignoring Pietro.

"What?" Todd asked.

"He goes, straight out of the blue, 'you have really nice eyes.' And Pietro goes ,what? You've had too much to drink haven't you?' And Toby says, 'na ah. You do have nice eyes. And lips.' What a pick up line! I'm telling you, if this guy was straight there wouldn't be a single girl in this entire town that wouldn't be begging for affection at his feet. He'd be a God!"

"He _kissed_ you!?!" Todd turned to Pietro.

"Fuck. Off," Pietro said through gritted teeth.

"Oh Pietro!" Lance cried, "don't you love me!?!"

Grinning, Todd joined in, "yes! Don't you want to kiss my tempting lips and hold me oh so close?"

"I said go away! I don't like Toby at all! Repeat, not at all!" 

"You're just saying that," Todd objected, "I know you want to kiss Toby again. Was he good Pietro? Huh? Did he make you go all a quiver?"

"No!"

"Yeeeees he did!" Lance grinned.

"Stop putting words in my mouth! I don't like Toby!"

"Pietro and Toby sitting in a tree," Todd grinned.

"K-I-S-S-I-N-G!" Lance joined in.

"First comes love."

"Then comes marriage!"

"Then comes the Pietro to kill all bad and annoying friends!" Pietro swung a fist at Todd. Todd whipped his hand up and caught Pietro's wrist.

"Ohh look-see Lance," Todd grinned, "nail polish. Tsk tsk Pietro. Haven't we told you before not to wear this? People might think you're fruity."

"It's not like it's purple!" Pietro protested, "and you've worn it before!"

"But I don't wear it constantly. You know, now that I think about it, you do wear this stuff quite a bit."

"Chicks dig it!" Pietro protested, trying to yank his hand away, "do you know how many girls I've met thanks to this black liquid?"

"And guys," Lance grinned. "Remember that guy at the movies Pietro? He thought you were sending a signal out to him."

"You _had_ to bring that up didn't you Lance? You just couldn't resist."

"No I couldn't. Bad Lance. Bad," Lance smacked his wrist gently.

"Pietro's a gay magnet!" Todd cried out, laughing.

"I am not!"

"Gay magnet!"

"Shut up Todd!"

"Is it just me," Freddy asked, "or is all this talk of fruit making you guys hungry too?"

"It's just you," Lance said.

"Oh."

"Gay magnet!"

"Girl repeller!"

"Gay magnet!"

"Fashion reject!"

"Once again, gay magnet!"

"Laaaaaaance! Make him stop!"

"No, I think I'll let this one continue."

"Fine! You wanna play rough, I can play rough!" Pietro zipped upstairs.

Todd just continued to lie on the floor laughing and saying over and over, "Pietro's a gay magnet! Pietro's a gay magnet!" 

"Take this Toad boy!"

WHUUMP!

"Oww, my head! This was just a bout name calling," Todd objected.

"Yes but seeing as I'm the fruity one I resorted to cat fighting!"

"So you admit you're fruity!?!"

"No! I didn't say that!"

"Yes you did. You said seeing as I'm the fruity one."

"Stop twisting my meanings!"

"No!"

"Yes!"

"No!"

"Yes!"

"NO!"

"YES!"

"Okay! Getting old fast!" Lance interrupted.

"Hey, do you guys smell burning?"

Pietro sniffed the air, "yes."

The three boys looked at the empty space where Freddy had been and then at each other. "Oh no!"

They raced into the kitchen where Freddy was frantically trying to rescue a bowl of burning chocolate.

"Oh Freddy!" Lance cried, "how many times have we told you. If you want to cook something ask us!"

"But you were busy," Freddy said, shuffling his feet, "and I wanted a fondue. All that talk of fruit made me hungry."

Todd grinned maniacally, "Toby ever cover you in chocolate Pietro?"

"Todd is no more!" Pietro yelled rushing at the youngest mutant.

"No! Come back!" Lance called, "I don't want to have to clean up Freddy's mess! Guys? Guys? COME BACK YOU MORONS!" 


End file.
